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Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps S01-S09 (960*540p, soft Eng subs)
Laughs, love triangles and lairiness. Friends navigate adulting in noughties Runcorn.
S01E01 Fags, Shags and Kebabs
Sitcom about the lives and loves of five 19-year-olds. Donna needs a man so her mum won't think she's repellent to the opposite sex. Janet wants to help, but discovers that matchmaking can seriously damage your boyfriend.
S01E02 Spunk
Jonny tries to be horrible to Janet and fails miserably. Donna is after as much sex with as little commitment as possible. Flo, however, has other plans. Louise discovers that dieting can damage the buttocks.
S01E03 Bone with the Wind
When Gaz finds Donna's toothbrush in his flat, he realises he has to stop her 'merging'. Janet's plan to make Jonny fancy her backfires
S01E04 Angry Wangry
Janet is keen to improve her mind, but realises that neither poetry nor biscuits are the answer. Gaz is desperate to feel attractive, and thinks that the best way to accomplish this is to flash his rather underdeveloped chest.
S01E05 Lard
Jonny falls for Janet's friend Louise, until his obsession is cured in a revolting manner. Janet decides to become a stand-up comedian. Gaz attempts to manipulate Donna.
S01E06 Ugly Babies
Jonny wants some excitement in his life, and when Janet reveals some remarkable news, he gets rather more than he bargained for. Gaz and Donna have a communication problem - she wants to talk and he wants sex. Louise is simply desperate to prove that she is not an idiot.
S02E01 On The Blob
Sitcom about five twentysomething friends. Gaz runs naked through the streets of Runcorn but still has to face up to Donna's pregnancy. And Louise's psychic powers inspire Jonny to make an unusual career move
S02E02 Bungle
Louise copes with a new boyfriend who is desperate to have sex with her, Janet's dinner party goes awry when Gaz and Donna abuse her trifle, and Jonny finds an unusual way to spend his scratchcard winnings.
S02E03 Dirty Girls
Janet rediscovers a love letter from her gorgeous ex and resorts to deception to prevent Jonny becoming jealous. Flo asks Donna to move out so she can set up a massage parlour in her old room. And, unable to decide how to handle her boyfriend, Louise experiments with gay sex.
S02E04 Vomit
Gaz looks after an unwell Jonny, although Donna is worried that his 'illness' is just an excuse to avoid her now that she has moved in. Meanwhile Janet goes too far with her old flame Andy, and Louise discovers there's more to owning a dog than tickling its tummy.
S02E05 Crusty Curtains
Jonny isn't speaking to Janet and taking Gaz's advice only makes things worse. While Louise tries to affect a reconciliation, Donna and Gaz lay down some ground rules for the flat, much to Donna's regret
S02E06 Mo Mo and Pigsy
In a far from ideal scenario, Donna is living with Jonny, and Janet is living with Gaz. But Jonny thinks Janet has gone to live with Andy and, after being nudged by Donna, goes to get her back. Meanwhile, Louise believes astrology is the answer to everyone's problems.
S03E01 Munch
Sitcom about five twentysomething friends. Jonny's job hunt is thwarted by a sex-starved cat. Gaz meets the brother he never knew he had, and Louise chokes on her lunch.
S03E02 Fish
Janet agrees to give up smoking before she and Jonny get married, but her craving for nicotine makes her turn violent. Gaz is worried that Donna doesn't fancy him any more. Louise agrees to meet a secret admirer.
S03E03 Kangaroo
Jonny begs Janet's dad for his blessing for their wedding and gets a great deal more than he bargained for. Donna plans a kinky night in. Louise and David find a new way to play the game of love.
S03E04 Bestiality
Munch takes an unusual shine to Donna. Louise has to cope with a dirty secret from David's past.
S03E05 Hospikal
Jonny discovers Janet's dad has a dirty secret. Gaz tries to avoid Munch and ends up in hospital. Donna tricks Louise into making up with her.
S03E06 Dresses Dresses Dresses
Janet, Donna and Louise go shopping for Janet's wedding dress - and get into all kinds of trouble. Jonny and Gaz discover a secret new kind of beer.
S03E07 Mokky Bocka
Jonny gets a job and a sexy offer he can't refuse. Gaz and Donna are up all night for the wrong reasons. David shows Louise a new way to cope with growing old.
S03E08 Jammy Dodgers
Janet tries to get passionate with Jonny. Gaz sends Donna out for a night on the town so he can get passionate with himself. Louise has trouble when her new boyfriend comes over all sexy.
S03E09 Dump
Janet has decided that the most important thing about getting married is the presents she'll receive, so makes a list.
S03E10 Schluballybub
Gaz has a health scare and blames Donna. Jonny is so interested that he fails to notice that Janet is having second thoughts about marrying him. David finds a new way to test Louise's commitment.
S03E11 When Janet Met Johnny
Action-packed special of the comedy series. An extended flashback to the moment that Janet and Jonny first met on a night out in sunny Runcorn, in the form of a fantastic musical extravaganza.
S04E01 Corinthian Dies
Janet tries to dump Jonny but is upstaged by some pasties. Louise gets revenge on David. Donna finds the courage to pursue a new dream.
S04E02 Piggy Goes Oink
Jonny finds himself a new girlfriend. Gaz challenges David to a drinking contest for Donna. A book called Piggy Goes Oink changes Louise's life.
S04E03 My Delicious Guava
Jonny ruins his first date with Kate by trying too hard to be manly. A big hairy spider upsets Louise's plan to live with Janet. Gaz bids to become a pop idol.
S04E04 Cuggles
Janet and Gaz get much closer than they'd ever intended. Jonny and Kate find out how biscuits can improve your love life, while Louise applies for a lucrative new job.
S04E05 Purgatory
Gaz tries to get over his guilt by doing a special thing for Donna. Janet holds a party for Louise's graduation.
S04E06 Mate Date
Gaz goes on a quest to split Jonny and Kate. Jonny gets an ultimatum - dump his friends or be dumped. Janet gets a new boss from hell.
S04E07 Homeless and Horny
Donna's tutor invites her for extra coaching on his sofa. Gaz has a problem in his trousers. Janet tries to persuade Jonny to come for a bite of her pasties.
S04E08 Filthy Brunching
Donna goes for a filthy brunching with her tutor. Gaz finds an unusual solution to his problem. Janet tries to excite Jonny with adventurous sex. Louise gets Jonny into serious trouble with the police.
S05E01 Death
With Jonny gunned down by the police, Janet struggles to cope with her loss. Louise tries to avoid all blame for the shooting. When grief softens Gaz's sex-drive, Donna finds an inventive way to arouse him.
S05E02 Nobbly Bobbly
Donna discovers a dreadful secret in her dead mum's house.
Jonny gets scared to leave the house.
S05E03 Shrink
Jonny gets some very exciting news. Janet and Gaz take extreme measures to stop Louise blackmailing them. Donna decides to spend, spend, spend, until Gaz drops a bombshell.
S05E04 Ecuador
Jonny's new car gives him trouble with women. Donna takes revenge on Gaz for sleeping with Janet. Louise fights dirty to win Jonny's forgiveness for getting him shot
S05E05 Potato People
Jonny and Louise get into trouble with some rampaging kids. Donna and Kelly team up to give Gaz a sexual surprise. Janet tries to get Donna to forgive her for sleeping with Gaz.
S05E06 Antlers
Gaz gets into trouble when his plans for Jonny's stag night go seriously wrong. Louise tries to make Janet's hen party into the wildest ever.
S05E07 Crab
Janet and Jonny go missing on their wedding day. Gaz resorts to a desperate plan to save the day. Louise gets sentenced for shooting Jonny.
S05E08 Fat
Five months after Jonny and Janet got married, Donna and Gaz are still not talking. Donna has moved up in the bucket world, and is on a mission to sell 4,000 buckets in five days. In attempting to get Donna back, Gaz finds an interesting way to lose weight. Janet fears that her nesting instinct will never kick in.
S05E09 Stot or Pronk
Janet shows off at the pub quiz. Gaz spanks his monkey. And Donna tries to impress Gaz with a facelift.
S05E10 Who's the Daddy?
Janet is rushed to hospital, helped by Louise. Gaz lets slip to Jonny that the baby might be his. Donna finally forgives Gaz.
S05E11 Bababababa
When Janet becomes a baby bore Jonny takes drastic action to get her attention. Louise tries to bag herself one of Kelly's fellas. Donna and Gaz try their hand at babysitting.
S05E12 God
Jonny tries to make his son more exciting. Gaz becomes a new man for Donna by taking Flo's HRT tablets. Louise finds God
S05E13 Love 83199
Jonny bids for a chance at his dream job. Gaz and Donna find their dream house. Louise dates her mobile phone and finally gets herself an amazing boyfriend.
S05E14 Near, Far
Jonny goes for his interview at the biscuit factory. Janet gets the chance to be a star. Gaz has to confront his greatest fear - sheep. And Louise struggles to keep Mick
S06E01 Speedycruise
Janet has a dilemma - does she leave her friends and baby for a life of luxury singing on a cruise? Donna becomes rich after her dead mother's money from the house comes through and has a very weird business venture idea.
S06E02 Goblins
Janet gets a new job, but Donna's career is on the skids. Louise has a letter from her earth mother - but she can't open it. Jonny campaigns for baby changing facilities at the pub.
S06E03 Mummy Cupboard
Gaz decides it's time to make a proper commitment to Donna. Janet tries talking dirty for a living and Louise is in for a shock when she finally meets her real parents.
S06E04 Cauliflower
Donna gives Gaz the answer to his marriage proposal. Janet finds a new way of providing for her child - the only problem is, it's illegal. Louise meets her real dad for the first time, but he is more interested in getting to know Jonny.
S06E05 Drunk
Jonny is reeling after being chatted up by Louise's Dad. He decides to become more macho, but his plan backfires with shocking consequences. Louise is feeling let down by her Dad and becomes a really bad alcoholic. And Donna refuses to have Gaz's baby, leaving him only one option for getting the child he longs for.
S06E06 Croppity Crops
Janet is reeling that Gaz tried to take Corinthian and decides to increase security in the home. Jonny gets a job as a farmer. Donna persuades Gaz to try tantric sex, but he gets hooked on it, much to her frustration. Louise wants a new family and she knows exactly where to find one.
S06E07 Finger Sniffing
Janet and Donna compete for a job managing the pub. Louise buys a car with her mother's legacy.
S06E08 War, Hurrgh!
Janet starts her job as manager of The Archer and gives the pub a World War Two theme to appeal to the grey pound. Donna is intent on revenge, Jonny tries to help Gaz become a dad and Louise becomes a prostitute.
S06E09 Closing Time
Janet tries desperately to find a way of keeping the pub open. Louise is feeling unwell and Kelly thinks she recognises the symptoms. Jonny thinks he has fallen in love with Gaz. And Donna's little brother causes chaos when he comes to stay.
S06E10 When Janet Killed Jonny
The Archer is about to be demolished in this special horror episode. The gang decide to break in for one last night together, but once inside, strange things start to happen and they find themselves trapped inside a pub that seems intent on killing them, one by one.
S07E01 When Jonny Met Sharky
When the Archer pub reopens after its refurb, Louise, Janet and Donna compete against each other for the job of barmaid. Jonny wins a competition to go shark-jumping in Hawaii, while Gaz desperately tries to do something more exciting than Jonny in Runcorn.
S07E02 Dabdaa!
With Jonny dead, Janet decides she must get through the five stages of grief quickly and Gaz finds a painful way to help her. Donna sets out to prove that she is not what Gaz calls a damp squid. Louise finds a sick way to persuade her friends that she really is pregnant.
S07E03 Homophobia Is Gay
Janet takes desperate action to stay safe for baby Corinthian. Gaz seeks a new friend who can replace Jonny. Louise consorts with the spirit world to persuade Janet to let her move in with her. Donna tries to get camp new bar manager Tim to come out.
S07E04 Dead Jonny Walking
Louise is distressed to learn she's carrying a girl, not a boy. After Donna fires Tim she is forced to work with depressed Janet and mad Munch. Gaz struggles to train Munch to be his best man while Janet picks a theme for Donna and Gaz's wedding: 'dead Jonny'.
S07E05 Here Bums the Bride
Gaz works through his list of three things he must do before he dies. Donna gets work in a charity shop to try to overcome her fear of death. Louise stumbles across a massive secret about Corinthian.
S07E06 Six Months Later
When the bailiffs come to repossess her house, Janet has just 24 hours to get some money or lose her home. Louise finds a rich criminal who seems keen to help but all he offers Janet is a spit roast. Gaz struggles to babysit his son Corinthian. Donna desperately awaits the call to an interview for her dream job,
S07E07 African Death Face
When Donna goes to London to get her dream job, Janet and Gaz are left alone together. After a night of Lambrini and candles they wake up and realise they've had sex again. Donna learns the art of bluff during her interview. Louise starts having contractions.
S07E08 Borry
With Donna about to go to London, the secret of Janet and Gaz's relationship comes out. Then Donna reveals she's got a secret of her own. Louise finally has her baby, enthusiastically assisted by Munch.
S08E01 Candle
It's Janet and Gaz's first night as a couple after Donna has moved to London to be with Wesley and start a new career. Gaz has arranged a babysitter for Corinthian so they can go to The Archer, but Janet objects when it turns out to be his ex-girlfriend Bald Shirley and insists they stay in for a romantic night.
S08E02 Gazman
Donna visits from London as she is missing her Runcorn roots and friends. She tells Janet all about her fabulous new boyfriend, Wesley Presley, but Janet is dubious. Gaz applies for parental responsibility of Corinthian but panics when he thinks that the judge doesn't consider him responsible enough. Even dressing like a superhero doesn't help. Donna makes him realise that he is an excellent father and just needs to be himself. When he and Janet go back to court they succeed in becoming a proper family. At the opposite end of the scale, Louise is struggling as a new mum, leaving baby Louise with Arthur and worrying that she can't cuddle her as she's scared she'll break her. Tim advises her on how to be more caring and responsible. When Janet and Gaz question Donna on her new life, she insists Wesley is amazing and invites him to come up and meet her friends in The Archer. When Wesley turns up, he offends everyone in The Archer and demands that Donna chooses between her new life in London and her old life in Runcorn.
S08E03 Flan Van
Janet is mugged and decides she wants to become a Police Community Support Officer to protect others from the same fate, so sets about learning her policing skills by practising on her friends. Wesley comes back to Runcorn in an attempt to win back Donna's heart and asks Gaz for advice on what to do. Gaz advises Wesley that he needs to be more like him. Donna is furious with Gaz after he tries to set her up with a tramp and also when she sees that he's given terrible advice to Wesley and is interfering in her life. However, she softens when she realises that he is genuinely concerned about her. Louise is determined to find a father figure to help her look after baby Louise, but after failing with both Tim and Gaz, Tim makes her realise she can do it all by herself with the support from her friends. Wesley decides to try and show Donna that he's serious about her so he moves in with her, but only if she'll do something important for him.
S08E04 Ello Ello
Janet has become a PCSO and tries to gain Gaz's respect by making her first arrest. This proves more difficult than she imagined and she ends up landing herself in deep water instead. Louise is worried that Janet is a better mother than her, so she dresses like Janet and tries to improve baby Louise's IQ by quizzing her on mathematics. Donna and Gaz are both distressed when they receive their divorce papers. They decide they are not ready to have a happy divorce yet and run off to tell Janet, who is upset they think she is such a pushover. Wesley tries to fit in with the gang by learning what he sees as the Runcornian way of life - eating pasties, shimmying like Tim and borrowing each other's clothes. When Donna sees the effort he has gone to for her, looking ridiculous shimmying in Janet's PCSO uniform, she softens. Will she divorce Gaz after all?
S08E05 D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
Donna and Gaz have decided to get divorced and the decision takes them on a path down memory lane. They look back at their relationship in a series of fantasies and flashbacks, including the time they first met one another at the age of five, where we discover the reason for Gaz's fear of sheep. They also imagine how life would be without one another. Donna wonders what she and Louise will be like as old ladies and Gaz imagines how fat he may have been if they'd never met. This terrifies them and makes them wonder if they have actually made the right decision to divorce.
S08E06 Val Doonican
Now that Gaz and Donna are divorced, Gaz decides the time has come to propose to Janet. Scared that she is losing all her friends, in particular Gaz, Donna insists on helping him organise the proposal, much to the disapproval of Tim who worries she's holding onto the past and not moving on. Gaz and Donna enjoy spending time together, possibly too much, and it conjures up old feelings. Wesley gives Janet a job on the market stall and teaches her the trade, but she struggles as she suffers increasingly from a stomach ache. When the pain gets so bad and she is rushed to hospital she asks Wesley to phone Gaz, but he is nowhere to be found.
S08E07 You Decide
Janet arrives back from hospital with Wesley and Tim, minus an appendix, and there is no sign of Gaz. Janet catches him out when he comes creeping back into the house later on. When he finds out that she has spent the night with Wesley holding her hand he blurts out that he has slept with Donna, so Janet throws him out. Louise tells Tim she is desperate for a boyfriend, just as ex-boyband member Scott enters the pub. He tries to woo her, but she is convinced there must be something wrong with him. There is, but it's not what she thinks. Gaz is torn between the two girls and although he decides to stay with Janet for the sake of Corinthian, when he goes to tell Donna he realises he loves her too and can't be without her. Janet and Wesley go to the flat only to discover them in bed together once more. They demand he makes a choice between Janet and Donna.
S08E08 Keep on Running
Donna and Janet are furious with Gaz and demand he decides who he wants to be with by three o'clock. He has no idea who to choose and decides to audition them both. Louise is worried her new boy-band boyfriend Scott is going to run off on tour with a groupie and turns all Fatal Attraction on him, before Gaz gives her the simplest of advice on how to make a man fall in love with you. Tim helps the girls realise just what a sexist pig he is and tell him he can forget both of them. Wesley confronts Gaz, as does Tim, and it soon dawns on him that he may have lost them both. He only has five minutes to go when he realises who he really wants. He races against time to get to the girl, but obstacles get in his way. Will he make it in time, and who will he choose?
The Aftermath: Part One - Waiting for Gaz
A musical extravaganza in The Archer. Janet is waiting for Gaz to return to The Archer and announce he has chosen her, unaware he has been in an accident and has already made his choice - Donna. She is convinced he will pick her and is heartbroken when all her dreams are crushed. How will she finally realise that she deserves better than Gaz and needs to put Corinthian first? How will Wesley and Janet look to the future alone? How will Tim make them see sense? Perhaps with the help of song, dance and a whole lot of glitz.
The Aftermath: Part Two - Sliding Gaz
A Sliding Doors-style two-hander. Gaz has fallen into a coma, shortly after telling Donna he wanted to be with her. As she sits by his bedside, she begs God to give him back, saying that she is prepared to take 'whatever the consequences'. She imagines two separate realities, one where Gaz is back to full health and one where he is paralysed. Both possibilities are followed in parallel, which take very differing paths. How will fully-fit Gaz respond to the news that Donna may not want children in the future? Or that he may not have any friends? How will paralysed Gaz cope with being in a wheelchair, with the prospect that he may never walk again? How does this reflect on their relationship and can Donna really take either of these consequences?
S09E01 Nil By Muff
Gaz and Donna are finally together, but Gaz was left paralysed by his accident and the two of them are struggling to come to terms with his new life in a wheelchair. Wannabe footballer Billy is introduced to the Runcornians. He was helping to take care of Gaz in hospital and is trying desperately hard to become his friend, but Gaz is confused by his metrosexual ways. Tim is still running The Archer, but his life is thrown into chaos when his younger sister Cassie turns up on his doorstep - she has just been released from Young Offenders and needs somewhere to stay. Will big brother forgive her for bullying him when they were growing up and let her stay? She certainly hopes so, as The Archer is where the object of her obsession, Billy, has started to hang out.
S09E02 Cheese Toastie
Gaz struggles to get used to his metrosexual carer Billy. Not only does Billy have manicures, he keeps calling him babe and trying to hug him. Billy is upset, but he's determined to win Gaz round no matter what it takes. Gaz finally cracks and throws him out - but when disaster strikes, who will save him? Donna faces up to her responsibilities now she is the breadwinner, and heads down to the job centre. She is thrown when she sees her old nemesis from school and is left feeling inadequate that she too doesn't have a career. She battles with her pride before finally giving in and signing on the dole. Tim tries to give sister Cassie a makeover so that Billy will take more notice of her, and the world gets to see his Gok as he tries to help her discover her inner diva.
S09E03 Trial Schmile
Gaz and Billy are now friends after Billy saved him from the fire. So when Billy misses his trial because they were getting drunk, Gaz vows to get him another trial by any means possible, including bribing the football manager with false sexual harassment claims. Donna and Gaz have moved into Janet's old house, causing Donna to re-examine her life and find inner peace, resulting in her shedding her clothes. Completely. But can she resist being lured back into the corporate world when a very generous offer comes her way? Cassie is determined to discover a deep dark secret about Tim to blackmail him with. But is she, and the rest of the gang, prepared for the truth when he finally spills it?
S09E04 The Gaz-Bot
Gaz begins to embrace being in a wheelchair and decides to become a Paralympian. Donna sees this as a golden opportunity to prepare for her new HR manager job and takes over his training, pushing him to the limit when she forces him into a marathon. Billy agrees to a date with Cassie. He isn't exactly won over with an outing to see cage fighting, or her dedication of a song by her favourite band, Rectal Discharge. But when she starts bossing him about and dominating him, he realises the missing something he was looking for in a girl. Having come out, Tim struggles to leave his old life behind and considers winning back Helena. But when he goes to the rugby club to do so, he finds his head is turned by the very fit, young, naked men and realises he is most definitely gay.
S09E05 Shagger
Now Tim has finally come out he is determined to meet a nice boyfriend, but worries that is easier said than done in Runcorn. So he enlists the help of Shagger, a new phone app, which ends up causing problems when he actually meets a potential love interest, Leonard. Billy and Cassie's love affair has hotted up, causing him to take his eye off the ball in football training. She gets the wrong end of the stick when he wants her to stop coming to watch him and she tries to impress him by dressing as a WAG, wearing both perfume and knickers for the first time. Donna has something worrying her and sets about finding a New Best Friend to confide in, which isn't easy when they all turn out to be vampires or eco warriors. Gaz decides he must walk again and tries to think of all the things that would motivate him - porn, football, beer - to no avail. What will get him out of his chair?
S09E06 This Is Your Life
After Donna's revelation that she may be pregnant, she and Gaz have some big decisions ahead, and they are not easy for the couple to come to terms with. Gaz realises he has spent his entire life in Runcorn, and now he can walk again, he is curious about the rest of the world. But could he really leave Runcorn? Cassie and Billy's love affair is blossoming, but is rocked when her ex-boyfriend Graham turns up out of the blue and tries to win her back. Will she choose her schoolgirl crush, Billy, or go back to her old life with Graham? Tim finally lands a date with Leonard. His nerves get the better of him, but Leonard is very persistent - will he manage to get his man?
First broadcast: February 2001-May 2011
Duration: 30 minutes per episode
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